Kiwanuka & Zalwango

“… about a month ago, I sent you a DM … I shoot my shot!”

The feast of St. Valentine’s Day is upon us, and one finds oneself in a tight spot of writer’s block. This time I’ll share a story, not Romeo and Juliet, I read a few years ago (there’s a big reveal at the end), it should give insights on how people “sent DMs in the past” and “shoot their shots” or was it “shot their shots” …

Kiwanuka knew that, in order to rehabilitate his family effectively, it was important to get himself a wife. He did not have definite plans for marriage yet but in June, on corpus Christi day, he noticed a tall slender brown girl in church. The girl’s striking natural beauty and charm attracted Kiwanuka’s attention. Zalwango was eighteen when Kiwanuka first saw her. It was love at first sight and he resolved to marry her. “That’s the girl I’m going to marry,” Kiwanuka confided to his friends. Those who knew him well could not ignore that statement. It was well known that he would not relent until he achieved this goal.
He embarked on research into the girl’s background and discovered that Zalwango was born in 1928 in Buwekula county, Mubende. Her father, Noah Kirya, was a Munyoro prince of the Bachwezi dynasty. Kirya had migrated to Mawogola apparently after a quarrel with his brother. He had settled mong the Bahima pastoralists in that area. Unfortunately for Zalwango her loving father died when she was only eight years old.
Her uncle who became her guardian was a reckless character who quickly disrupted the life of his late brother’s family. As a result, most members of Kirya’s household fled the home. Only Zalwango, who was too young to flee, and so stayed home. Her uncle’s immediate thought was to marry her off as quickly as possible in order to get bridewealth for himself. But the poor girl was not ready for her uncle’s marriage schemes. Though she sought refuge with relatives, her uncle still insisted that she had to get married.
In order to escape from her uncle’s marriage plans, Zalwango managed to get in touch with Father Maurice Mukasa, the priest of the nearest catholic parish in her area. Father Mukasa adopted and enlisted her as an aspirant to sisterhood.

When Father Mukasa was transferred to Kitasa Parish in Bukomansimbi county, he went with her.
During her stay at the mission, Zalwango matured quickly. The girl had daily unfolding noble Christian qualities which impressed Father Mukasa and other members of the mission. She was mature, responsible, modest, humble and pious. Such a woman was bound to attract the attention of many suitors. According to Zalwango, Kiwanuka was the twenty-fifth suitor.Soon after seeing Zalwango, Kiwanuka wrote a torrent of letters to the girl seeking her friendship. His expression of love was not immediately reciprocated. Zalwango did not respond to any of those letters. Her silence hurt Kiwanuka’s youthful pride greatly. But Kiwanuka was not the sort of man to be easily discouraged. He resolved to continue his struggle until he won Zalwango’s heart.

Nevertheless, Kiwanuka persisted through one love letter after another. He also bought some smart suits in order to impress the elusive girl. Weekend visits from Kampala to Kisabwa and, of course, to the mission became more frequent. On all these occasions he appeared garbed in various European suits but to his disappointment the girl appeared to take no notice. The quest for the girl’s heart went on for five months. To many a young man, five months of fruitless endeavour was too long. But not Kiwanuka. The more Zalwango became elusive the more Kiwanuka resolved to win her over. So, the love letters continued to flow unabated, with Zalwango destroying them with the same swiftness which Kiwanuka used to write them.
But there is always a limit to unreciprocated love. Kiwanuka’s zeal began to cool down after numerous fruitless efforts to arouse the attention of the girl. The protracted pursuit seemed to have reached a dead end. But Kiwanuka made one more effort to win the heart of Zalwango. He wrote a letter in which he reminded her that time was not on her side. He stressed that it was in her interest to get married before it was too late.
It is not clear whether Kiwanuka’s implied threat was the cause of her positive response or whether the flood of letters had already softened her heart. Whatever the cause might have been, before giving up the struggle, her response to his last letter enchanted Kiwanuka very much. Zalwango’s letter found him reconstructing the roof of his cottage. When he received the letter, he became so excited that he climbed down and hurried to inform his mother and brother about the good news. “She has accepted! The girl has accepted!” he cried. “Where is the letter?” his mother asked. In his excitement, he had forgotten the letter on the roof. So he rushed up again to collect it.
His brother accompanied him to meet the girl on the appointed day. Zalwango who was struck by the personality and stature of her suitor softly asked: “So you’re the one. And what have you been doing all this time if you’re not yet married?”
Kiwanuka explained that he had not yet married because he had been serving in the second world war. “I’m not just after exploiting you, I want to marry you,” he assured the young woman. During the course of that interview the girl was alert to detect any flaws of character in her future husband. She detected none. She was particularly struck by Kiwanuka’s fingers. She was later to tell to her children that she had never seen such beautiful fingers as their father’s.
From their first interview, Benedicto Kiwanuka and Maxencia Zalwango developed a mutual loving relationship. Eventually the wedding was fixed on 18^th February, 1947. Kiwanuka was given seven days’ leave and the ceremony officiated by Father Mukasa, the parish priest and Zalwango’s benefactor took place at Kitovu Mission.

… or “shoot forth thy shot.”

Reference

Bade, Albert (1996) Benedicto Kiwanuka: The Man and His Politics. Fountain Publishers, Kampala. pp. 7-10